Opinion / Columnist
Zimbabwe is never short of scammers
9 hrs ago | Views
They came and beguiled nobles and laity by claiming gasoline was oozing out of a sacred rock formations somewhere in rural Chinhoyi. Innocent boulders were soaked in a deluge of diesel and people fell for it hook line and sinker. But, alas it was all but a ruse.
A choreographed energy inclined drama, the chief actress Rotina Mavhunga had good times, freebies and goodies availed to her for a nonexistent, seemingly promising OPEC membership. What more, 'our diesel' needed no refinery since it came in usable form. Then, OMG! A whole university scientist confirmed the diesel was more pure than all known brands. Aah, even Grace Jones was dwarfed by the iconic Southern Africa actress, Rotina Mavhunga. She hovered above us all in a helicopter, looking down upon the commoners toiling it out in fields and gardens. Clever Rotina!
Then came another confidence trickster. No more rocks diesel but 'Zvihuta', this was the 'McCoy'. The tiny upland bird found itself atracting all, the afflicted and the fittest were all looking for the new boys in town. Its meat and eggs became the panacea to all ailments overnight.
Broiler chicken farming became the least considered. Even eateries dropped the plumaged 'Isian Bolt' road-runner from the menu opting for Chihuta, what feat? If that did not tap you on the shoulders then rewind back to 'growing potatoes' in a sack. I am holding back tears right now, whats wrong with us?
There is no shortcut to abundance, the secret is hard work. Gosh! My neighbour in Waterfalls dug out the evergreen lawn and had sacks filled up and arranged outside. Potatoes were planted and OK Zimbabwe was promised perpetual supply of potatoes from the expected yield. Come harvest time, the whole yard could hardly fill an archer, that small kitchen maize meal reservoir.
I am not done yet, the renowned Evangelist came up with an anointed pen, oil and brick. The pen to pass O-Levels, the oil as a bulwark against all maladies and the brick to get a miracle low density mansion. Really, what cheek? House from a common farm brick moulded from the contaminated Mukuvisi waters, I rest my case.
Aah yet another one, a miracle rising needle indicating fuel tank has filled up after seeding a fortune. Most adherents ululated and sang in praise of the man of God, sorry, read gold. Today the guy, guys, are whistling all the way to the banks.
Not done yet, remember the African potato, I shall not speak lest I cry out loudly, what is wrong with us? God help us.
Thomas Tondo Murisa. Chiweshe.
A choreographed energy inclined drama, the chief actress Rotina Mavhunga had good times, freebies and goodies availed to her for a nonexistent, seemingly promising OPEC membership. What more, 'our diesel' needed no refinery since it came in usable form. Then, OMG! A whole university scientist confirmed the diesel was more pure than all known brands. Aah, even Grace Jones was dwarfed by the iconic Southern Africa actress, Rotina Mavhunga. She hovered above us all in a helicopter, looking down upon the commoners toiling it out in fields and gardens. Clever Rotina!
Then came another confidence trickster. No more rocks diesel but 'Zvihuta', this was the 'McCoy'. The tiny upland bird found itself atracting all, the afflicted and the fittest were all looking for the new boys in town. Its meat and eggs became the panacea to all ailments overnight.
Broiler chicken farming became the least considered. Even eateries dropped the plumaged 'Isian Bolt' road-runner from the menu opting for Chihuta, what feat? If that did not tap you on the shoulders then rewind back to 'growing potatoes' in a sack. I am holding back tears right now, whats wrong with us?
There is no shortcut to abundance, the secret is hard work. Gosh! My neighbour in Waterfalls dug out the evergreen lawn and had sacks filled up and arranged outside. Potatoes were planted and OK Zimbabwe was promised perpetual supply of potatoes from the expected yield. Come harvest time, the whole yard could hardly fill an archer, that small kitchen maize meal reservoir.
I am not done yet, the renowned Evangelist came up with an anointed pen, oil and brick. The pen to pass O-Levels, the oil as a bulwark against all maladies and the brick to get a miracle low density mansion. Really, what cheek? House from a common farm brick moulded from the contaminated Mukuvisi waters, I rest my case.
Aah yet another one, a miracle rising needle indicating fuel tank has filled up after seeding a fortune. Most adherents ululated and sang in praise of the man of God, sorry, read gold. Today the guy, guys, are whistling all the way to the banks.
Not done yet, remember the African potato, I shall not speak lest I cry out loudly, what is wrong with us? God help us.
Thomas Tondo Murisa. Chiweshe.
Source - Thomas Tondo Murisa
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