Opinion / Columnist
Political comedy to determine the fate of Zimbabwe
25 Nov 2014 at 20:35hrs | Views
Robert Mugabe is easy to dislike but is such a crook that he is hard to hate.
Someone was telling me about Mugabe's wit recently.
Apparently, he was being interviewed by some journalist or other, possibly some of those Western press types who loathe him, and the interviewer started by asking: "Don't you think that finally the time has come for you to say farewell to Zimbabweans?"
To which the canny dictator deadpanned: "Oh, where are the Zimbabweans going?"
Now the old fool appears to have completely lost it.
According to Mr Jabulani Sibanda, leader of the War Veterans Association, Mugabe, 91 in a few months, has carried out a "bedroom coup" and is in the process of installing his wife, Grace Mugabe, president.
To which Mugabe has replied that Sibanda is "possessed by the spirit of Belzebub".
The most delicious power struggle is going on in Zimbabwe and the seriousness of the whole issue, that the fate of a nation will be determined, sort of casts a shadow on what is otherwise fantastic political comedy.
Mr Mugabe, with the help of those who passionately hate him, has totally destroyed the Zimbabwean economy, a view he, naturally, does not share.
Since Mugabe, in power since 1980, is showing signs of not living forever, the little matter of who will take over from him is now urgent.
Worked the miracle
On the one hand is Vice-President Joice Mujuru, a war veteran who fought under the nom de guerre "Teurai Ropa", Shona for spill the blood, and on the other, Defence minister Emmerson Mnangagwa, former spy chief commonly referred to as the "crocodile" and, from what I can see, the author of the Grace Project.
On the surface, it appears that Mugabe is grooming Grace, locally known as the First Shopper and Gucci Grace, because of her love for shopping.
First, Grace is now leader of the Zanu-PF Women's League.
Secondly, Mugabe, a very well-educated man, sent her back to the University of Zimbabwe and she worked the miracle of obtaining a PhD in sociology in a record three months.
She has also hinted that since she is Zimbabwean, just like other aspirants, why should she not run for office?
But you see, Mujuru must fall before Grace can rise.
So Grace, a 21-year-old typist when the presidential eye alighted upon her, has taken it upon herself to batter down the feisty Mujuru, 59.
Grace has accused the VP of planning to overthrow Mugabe and of being a Western stooge.
Now, I would not put it past the CIA or British spooks to have an agent of influence in Mugabe's inner court.
That would be a very dangerous game for Mujuru, but it is not beyond the realm of possibility.
However, it is more likely that these claims are being made to cut her legs with the highly motivated party membership, whose dislike for Western countries and their spies has been stoked and re-stoked over the years.
The most feared
It becomes even more intriguing given that Mujuru's husband, General Solomon Mujuru, died in suspicious circumstances on their 3,500-acre farm (grabbed from a settler, naturally).
He is said to have died of smoke-inhalation in a house that was guarded by police and with workers in the vicinity.
Gen Mujuru was one of the most feared and powerful men in Zimbabwe.
He was deputy commander-in-chief of Mugabe's guerrilla force, ZANLA, and is credited with convincing the rebels to accept Mugabe as their leader.
After independence, he became army chief and later politician. He is said to have been the only man who could rival Mugabe's influence in the party and it was expected that he would be influential in determining the succession.
As a matter of fact, quite apart from a 2004 vote by Zanu-PF Women's League that a woman should be elected the party's deputy leader, it is said that he persuaded Mugabe to pick his wife.
His death removed from the contest a very important factor in the succession.
His wife is no pushover, either. Pushing back at Grace's many attacks, she wrote on social media: "I fight in the legions of legions of legions of great men. I fight in legions. I don't fight shebeen and bedtime stories. Copy and paste that."
That last one was probably a backhanded compliment to Grace's academic prowess. Mujuru has support in the party, but with Mugabe throwing her under the bus and without her husband, she will need prayers.
But my money is not on Grace. My money is on the puppet master, Mr Mnangagwa.
mmutuma@ke.nationmedia.com
Someone was telling me about Mugabe's wit recently.
Apparently, he was being interviewed by some journalist or other, possibly some of those Western press types who loathe him, and the interviewer started by asking: "Don't you think that finally the time has come for you to say farewell to Zimbabweans?"
To which the canny dictator deadpanned: "Oh, where are the Zimbabweans going?"
Now the old fool appears to have completely lost it.
According to Mr Jabulani Sibanda, leader of the War Veterans Association, Mugabe, 91 in a few months, has carried out a "bedroom coup" and is in the process of installing his wife, Grace Mugabe, president.
To which Mugabe has replied that Sibanda is "possessed by the spirit of Belzebub".
The most delicious power struggle is going on in Zimbabwe and the seriousness of the whole issue, that the fate of a nation will be determined, sort of casts a shadow on what is otherwise fantastic political comedy.
Mr Mugabe, with the help of those who passionately hate him, has totally destroyed the Zimbabwean economy, a view he, naturally, does not share.
Since Mugabe, in power since 1980, is showing signs of not living forever, the little matter of who will take over from him is now urgent.
Worked the miracle
On the one hand is Vice-President Joice Mujuru, a war veteran who fought under the nom de guerre "Teurai Ropa", Shona for spill the blood, and on the other, Defence minister Emmerson Mnangagwa, former spy chief commonly referred to as the "crocodile" and, from what I can see, the author of the Grace Project.
On the surface, it appears that Mugabe is grooming Grace, locally known as the First Shopper and Gucci Grace, because of her love for shopping.
First, Grace is now leader of the Zanu-PF Women's League.
Secondly, Mugabe, a very well-educated man, sent her back to the University of Zimbabwe and she worked the miracle of obtaining a PhD in sociology in a record three months.
She has also hinted that since she is Zimbabwean, just like other aspirants, why should she not run for office?
But you see, Mujuru must fall before Grace can rise.
So Grace, a 21-year-old typist when the presidential eye alighted upon her, has taken it upon herself to batter down the feisty Mujuru, 59.
Grace has accused the VP of planning to overthrow Mugabe and of being a Western stooge.
Now, I would not put it past the CIA or British spooks to have an agent of influence in Mugabe's inner court.
That would be a very dangerous game for Mujuru, but it is not beyond the realm of possibility.
However, it is more likely that these claims are being made to cut her legs with the highly motivated party membership, whose dislike for Western countries and their spies has been stoked and re-stoked over the years.
The most feared
It becomes even more intriguing given that Mujuru's husband, General Solomon Mujuru, died in suspicious circumstances on their 3,500-acre farm (grabbed from a settler, naturally).
He is said to have died of smoke-inhalation in a house that was guarded by police and with workers in the vicinity.
Gen Mujuru was one of the most feared and powerful men in Zimbabwe.
He was deputy commander-in-chief of Mugabe's guerrilla force, ZANLA, and is credited with convincing the rebels to accept Mugabe as their leader.
After independence, he became army chief and later politician. He is said to have been the only man who could rival Mugabe's influence in the party and it was expected that he would be influential in determining the succession.
As a matter of fact, quite apart from a 2004 vote by Zanu-PF Women's League that a woman should be elected the party's deputy leader, it is said that he persuaded Mugabe to pick his wife.
His death removed from the contest a very important factor in the succession.
His wife is no pushover, either. Pushing back at Grace's many attacks, she wrote on social media: "I fight in the legions of legions of legions of great men. I fight in legions. I don't fight shebeen and bedtime stories. Copy and paste that."
That last one was probably a backhanded compliment to Grace's academic prowess. Mujuru has support in the party, but with Mugabe throwing her under the bus and without her husband, she will need prayers.
But my money is not on Grace. My money is on the puppet master, Mr Mnangagwa.
mmutuma@ke.nationmedia.com
Source - nationmedia
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