This and that with Mal'phosa: Zan'arcissists

We are in a forced relationship with a narcissistic government. They think they are the best. They think they are great and important. They think we can never survive without them. And they think we deserve them and they deserve us.

These are the Zan'arcissits. I have lost count of how many times we have rejected them in the last four decades. But they are hooked to us like listeria microbes to the intestines of a sickly old pig. We cannot flush them out because they use any means possible to keep us in the straight and narrow.

Narcissists are hurt when you leave and be at peace without them. They want to hold on to you and they don't want to let you go. They can't say goodbye.

Zanu as a party and government has long outlived their shelf-life. Still, they are here, in new suits but as the same old monsters we know.
Narcissists are hurt when you leave them because they can't stand being alone; they need to have people around them all the time. And if you leave them, they'll feel absolutely lost without your constant attention, and the consequences will be dire for you.

Narcissists can't stand it when other people get more attention than them. Trust me, when you don't give them the attention they crave, they'll make sure that everyone knows how much it hurts them. They were very hurt when Tsvangirai burst into the scene and stole the show. A lot of other guys had tried too, before Tswangirai, with dire consequences. Most were hounded and obliterated for good. Others were charged with treason and thretened with extinction.  Yet others remain maimed and disabled to this day. Yet a few more have either smoked the peace pipe with Zanuloquents, or left the political field in defeat and dismay, or recoiled into their own miserable shells, never to be heard of again.

Narcissists are hurt when you give admiration and praise to others. Remember what happened when the world had all its eyes on Zapu and umdala wethu as the next Government of Zimbabwe? He was hounded and harrassed into exile and finally into submission and subservience. Zan'arssicists had seen Nkomo as a threat to their self-esteem, and it caused them panic and pain. They were not only hurt by the world's affection and praise of Zapu but they were also jealous. They always believed that they were better than anyone else, so it's like a stab in the heart when someone else gets the spotlight.They loved it when the world began to recognize and  compliment them and their intelligent extra-ordinary accomplishments. Nkomo's people met one of the worst holocausts of the century. Look what is happening to the MDC factions and it's latest outcrop, Tripple C.

Narcissists are hurt when they are criticized. Criticism is the worst thing that can happen to a narcissist because it challenges their ego and makes them feel like they are not perfect. This often makes the narcissist lash out at the person criticizing them, and tend to take it as an attack on their character rather than a personal failure. Freedoms are curtailed, especially those of speech and association. You criticize Zan'arcissists at your own peril.

Yet they want us to believe that there is democracy in Zimbabwe. But, in Africa, democracy means that the biggest or most populous tribe wins the election. In Africa, might is right. Might means the biggest tribe with the most spears. Mthwakazi doesn't want democracy if it means that the biggest tribe, namely the shona, dominate us all with a one party, corrupt African basket case. Because that is not democracy. What we want, however, is a true democracy, with a specialized constitution - not a simple unitary system - a true democracy where every minority tribe has its proper, lawful, democratic representation and say in parliament; where all minorities are respected and legally protected. So there is no oppression. No domination. No dictatorship by one big chief of the biggest tribe with the most spears or AK47s.

Narssicists are not happy when you set boundaries. When you set a boundary, you are telling the narcissist that their behavior is not acceptable to you and that you will not accept it in the future. When they do something unacceptable and are told so, they may feel hurt because they think they were only being nice or helpful, even if their behavior caused harm or pain to another person.

I can't remember how many times Dr. Nkomo lamented about Zanu violating the constitution. Instead of assisting him, the world ogled Nkomo in disbelief, shook their heads, clicked their tongues and expressed their disappointment in him. Their blessed leader continued to appoint brown-nosed apparatchiks, muppets and donuts in key positions all over the country. There was a melee as these dregs shadowed one another in their quest to get a spot of their own at the feeding trough, and quickly forgot that they were elected to improve the lives of those who voted them in. They hunted like a pack of suckling hyenas, acted unscrupulously, manipulated facts and created their own rules. . They bulldozed and sledge-hammered every institution into rubble, and no one dared lift a finger.The country was ravenously plundered, mercilessly strangled, systematically throttled and left to die.

Mthwakazi is in the process of setting boundaries, too. They have raffled a few Za'narcissist feathers. We have seen how the Zanarcissists have lashed out, unleashing their urchins onto our leaders; incarcerating some and charging them with treason. Just because they want self-rule and self-determination?

Za'narcissists are hurt when you neglect and stop caring about them. When you stop feeding their egos by giving those compliments and attention or when you just don't seem to care about what they have to say anymore, it threatens their self-worth.  There was a time when people, shona included, stopped attending zanu rallies, until zanu sent it's paraffin selling graduates on them, forcibly sheperding them to their monotonous rallies. In these rallies, they are forced to denounce other political parties and leaders, and sing Zan'arcissists praises.

Ngiyabonga mina