Opinion / Columnist
Peter Tatchell was a 'journalist' too, Cdes
11 Jun 2015 at 04:00hrs | Views
Dear Cabinet and Politburo members
COMRADES, I know many of you were not at all taken aback with what happened in Abuja at the weekend when I was in Nigeria for the inauguration of that country's new leader, Brother Muhammadu Buhari since you have grown used to our detractors trying this and that trick on me.
I wonder how many of you know that that British-hired Australian gay gangster Peter Tatchell, the founder of that belligerent group Outrage! - who was given a thorough shellacking by my trusty security companions after being unleashed on me by little Tony Blair during my visit to Brussels in 2001 - started his rogue activities masquerading as a journalist?
So does it come to anyone as a surprise at all that this little witch together with her colleagues were hired by my detractors in the West to masquerade as journalists from Sahara TV in order to try and embarrass me?
Thankfully, I expected it and I was more than prepared. The whole thing ended up embarrassing those who had planned it.
That the whole thing was staged is never in doubt. The question should probably be on how much my hosts were complicit to this shameful conspiracy. This cannot be ruled out completely considering the justified indignation that arose when the same hostile Western detractors arm-twisted their media into deliberately misquoting me as saying Nigerians were crooks — which was pure fabrication. Anyway, if that is the type of security they have in that part of the world, then it is not surprising at all that Boko Haram is flourishing there.
I was not in Abuja primarily as the President of Zimbabwe, but first and foremost as the chairman of both the African Union and the Southern African Development Community (SADC), so I expected to answer questions strictly related to those two bodies. Clever questions like: "Your Excellency, Mr Chairman, we have vast oil here in Nigeria, but there are permanent fuel shortages…. how best can Nigeria exploit this natural resource for the benefit of her own people?" You see, such relevant and constructive questions would certainly have been helpful, not the type of questions that I found myself being bombarded with.
Surely, a decent journalist should be knowledgeable about the subject they want to interview someone about… how can they unleash that entranced witch to ask me redundant questions about when we are going to have elections in Zimbabwe as if we have never held any elections at all since 1980… and one of them even talked about 200 years! Surely even a borderline journalist would know that free and fair elections were held in this country less than two years ago and over 62 percent of Zimbabweans reposited their trust in me. So what else did they want? For the winner to simply go because their handlers can't wait to exploit the vast natural resources of our country? Silly of them!
That is the reason why I choose to remain quiet… I choose not to dignify their madness with answers. Had I answered those silly questions, my IQ would have plummeted by 14 points!
Anyway, I should sincerely thank my security companions for exercising great restraint under very trying circumstances otherwise they would have taught those scoundrels a real lesson… this would have given the misleading impression that we are a violent people.
Let us hope that we would soon be receiving a high-powered delegation from Abuja to profusely apologise for this madness!
Kindest Regards
Yours Sincerely
ME
… AND CZ'S NOTEBOOK
Inhumane!
THERE is this serious case before the courts of law. It involves some eight prison inmates who are part of a gang that stands accused of trying to escape from Chikurubi during a recent riot over food and living condition in prison.
Now read this: "The inmates are seeking to have their matter heard at the Constitutional Court claiming that their rights were impinged upon when prison officers allegedly tortured them, denied them medication and forced them to eat human excreta as punishment for attempting a jailbreak on March 13.
"In their application, the eight suspects claimed that they soiled their clothes after being tortured and were forced to eat the excreta."
Through their lawyer, David Hofisi, the suspects said they were now seeking permanent stay of their trial due to the torture.
"Hofisi said his clients' right to a fair trial had been affected by the alleged torture. He said the eight were tortured to confess to information relating to the alleged jailbreak…."
Smelly as they are, these are very, very serious allegations being made by these prisoners. Dr CZ thinks it was wrong to have left those accused at the mercy of the very prison officers whom they had allegedly tried to kill in the violent outbreak… they should have been put in custody of another security department.
This application is similar to that of Jestina Mukoko who could not be prosecuted for State security-related crimes she allegedly committed after the Supreme Court ruled that she was severely tortured and therefore her right to justice violated.
We hope and pray these scatological allegations are just that… allegations… otherwise to think that it is more than three-long decades after we became a rights-based society and people are being tortured to the extent of them being made to eat their own dung is reprehensible. To bastardise an oft-used saying by an old sage, the mark of our civilisation will be the humane manner in which we treat the weakest, the most vulnerable and even the scoundrels in our society.
Finally!
Don't they say make hay while the sun shines? This truism should aptly apply to vendors in the country who for more than six months, were allowed to do as they wanted. Nothing could last forever. Some seized the opportunity to change their lives forever, but others thought this would last ad infinitum.
As with everything, all things have to come to an end. This week Local Government minister Ignatius Chombo read the riot act. We are made to believe that all the lawlessness that has been allowed to prevail for political expedience would be coming to an end inside a week. This is bad news for those who never prepared for this… they surely cannot blame anyone for this. This is their government. And every people get a government they deserve!
O-oh finish!
Last week's watershed ruling by the Constitutional Court that police should not arrest women they suspect of loitering for purposes of prostitution was welcome by all progressive Zimbos… this was one illegality that had been allowed to flourish for too long.
Meanwhile, reports suggested that the overjoyed prostitutes… some of whom were regularly raped and or extorted from by rogue police officers, were celebrating their newly- found freedom by officering free sex to judges. Thankfully, Dr CZ is still a man of letters, not a judge, yet!
Now that another of their constituency from where rogue cops had the freedom to extort has been cut off, that leaves them primarily with those accused of this nebulous offence called "public drinking".
It is high time Dr CZ approached the same ConCourt so that it can explain what really constitutes this "public drinking" crime, and if indeed it is a crime in the first place. After hinting at this, one fan asked Dr CZ what he would offer the judges, that is tempting enough in case they need something to sway their thinking… Dr CZ is still seriously thinking about it.
If Tafadzwa Musarara & Co can have the gall to take Agriculture Minister Joseph Made to court to defend their monopoly over grain… why should Dr CZ and his soulmates not do the same? Beer firms should be too pleased to bankroll this lawsuit that Dr CZ is planning… it is their interests at stake here.
And as one fan rightly pointed out, arresting beer drinkers should be treated as an act of economic sabotage as this would reverse all the gains that have so far been realised under our highly successful Zimbabwe Agenda for Sustainable Socio-Economic Transformation blueprint. He argues: "Arresting drinkers will be tantamount to economic sabotage in the case of Zimbabwe. Breweries are some of the few companies that have survived the country's economic meltdown. But for them to have weathered the storm to this day, drinkers have supported them. So, by arresting people for so-called public drinking, the cops will in effect, be discouraging people from drinking. And when people stop or drink less, beer sales will naturally drop. The firms will have to retrench and thereby worsen unemployment. Eventually, the companies will pay less tax. It will be treasonous for the police to arrest these major economic players called drinkers for a petty crime called public drinking."
Tempting!
Dr CZ was impressed last week when Zanu-PF secretary for Administration Cde Ignatius Chombo attended the party's by-election rally in Kuwadzana towing his personal "prophet" and his personal n'anga so that the two could tell the voters the results of the June poll.
The two duly performed their task to satisfaction by telling the gathering that the former revolutionary party would be coasting to another victory… we thought this was obvious considering that the party will be contesting against itself? As much as we do not want to disparage the role of the ancestral spirits considering how important they were during the war of liberation, we however, cannot help it but shudder at the prospect of another round of the Chinhoyi diesel scenario visiting us!
On second thoughts, Dr CZ is tempted to take Cde Chombo's personal consultants seriously considering that he is reported to be one of the richest people hereabouts… maybe the formula could rub off!
Who isn't?
This week we woke up to reports that outgoing Zanu-PF youth chairman for Harare Cde Godwin Gomwe and his hangers-on were remanded in custody for allegedly extorting close to US$50 000 from Harare home seekers using the First Lady's name. The question that should be asked rather is: Who is not doing it? Isn't it the whole purpose of people getting into politics in the first place? Were it not for these benefits, Dr CZ would not be thinking of reconsidering his decision to quit the dirty game.
cznotebook@yahoo.co.uk
COMRADES, I know many of you were not at all taken aback with what happened in Abuja at the weekend when I was in Nigeria for the inauguration of that country's new leader, Brother Muhammadu Buhari since you have grown used to our detractors trying this and that trick on me.
I wonder how many of you know that that British-hired Australian gay gangster Peter Tatchell, the founder of that belligerent group Outrage! - who was given a thorough shellacking by my trusty security companions after being unleashed on me by little Tony Blair during my visit to Brussels in 2001 - started his rogue activities masquerading as a journalist?
So does it come to anyone as a surprise at all that this little witch together with her colleagues were hired by my detractors in the West to masquerade as journalists from Sahara TV in order to try and embarrass me?
Thankfully, I expected it and I was more than prepared. The whole thing ended up embarrassing those who had planned it.
That the whole thing was staged is never in doubt. The question should probably be on how much my hosts were complicit to this shameful conspiracy. This cannot be ruled out completely considering the justified indignation that arose when the same hostile Western detractors arm-twisted their media into deliberately misquoting me as saying Nigerians were crooks — which was pure fabrication. Anyway, if that is the type of security they have in that part of the world, then it is not surprising at all that Boko Haram is flourishing there.
I was not in Abuja primarily as the President of Zimbabwe, but first and foremost as the chairman of both the African Union and the Southern African Development Community (SADC), so I expected to answer questions strictly related to those two bodies. Clever questions like: "Your Excellency, Mr Chairman, we have vast oil here in Nigeria, but there are permanent fuel shortages…. how best can Nigeria exploit this natural resource for the benefit of her own people?" You see, such relevant and constructive questions would certainly have been helpful, not the type of questions that I found myself being bombarded with.
Surely, a decent journalist should be knowledgeable about the subject they want to interview someone about… how can they unleash that entranced witch to ask me redundant questions about when we are going to have elections in Zimbabwe as if we have never held any elections at all since 1980… and one of them even talked about 200 years! Surely even a borderline journalist would know that free and fair elections were held in this country less than two years ago and over 62 percent of Zimbabweans reposited their trust in me. So what else did they want? For the winner to simply go because their handlers can't wait to exploit the vast natural resources of our country? Silly of them!
That is the reason why I choose to remain quiet… I choose not to dignify their madness with answers. Had I answered those silly questions, my IQ would have plummeted by 14 points!
Anyway, I should sincerely thank my security companions for exercising great restraint under very trying circumstances otherwise they would have taught those scoundrels a real lesson… this would have given the misleading impression that we are a violent people.
Let us hope that we would soon be receiving a high-powered delegation from Abuja to profusely apologise for this madness!
Kindest Regards
Yours Sincerely
ME
… AND CZ'S NOTEBOOK
Inhumane!
THERE is this serious case before the courts of law. It involves some eight prison inmates who are part of a gang that stands accused of trying to escape from Chikurubi during a recent riot over food and living condition in prison.
Now read this: "The inmates are seeking to have their matter heard at the Constitutional Court claiming that their rights were impinged upon when prison officers allegedly tortured them, denied them medication and forced them to eat human excreta as punishment for attempting a jailbreak on March 13.
"In their application, the eight suspects claimed that they soiled their clothes after being tortured and were forced to eat the excreta."
Through their lawyer, David Hofisi, the suspects said they were now seeking permanent stay of their trial due to the torture.
"Hofisi said his clients' right to a fair trial had been affected by the alleged torture. He said the eight were tortured to confess to information relating to the alleged jailbreak…."
Smelly as they are, these are very, very serious allegations being made by these prisoners. Dr CZ thinks it was wrong to have left those accused at the mercy of the very prison officers whom they had allegedly tried to kill in the violent outbreak… they should have been put in custody of another security department.
This application is similar to that of Jestina Mukoko who could not be prosecuted for State security-related crimes she allegedly committed after the Supreme Court ruled that she was severely tortured and therefore her right to justice violated.
We hope and pray these scatological allegations are just that… allegations… otherwise to think that it is more than three-long decades after we became a rights-based society and people are being tortured to the extent of them being made to eat their own dung is reprehensible. To bastardise an oft-used saying by an old sage, the mark of our civilisation will be the humane manner in which we treat the weakest, the most vulnerable and even the scoundrels in our society.
Finally!
Don't they say make hay while the sun shines? This truism should aptly apply to vendors in the country who for more than six months, were allowed to do as they wanted. Nothing could last forever. Some seized the opportunity to change their lives forever, but others thought this would last ad infinitum.
As with everything, all things have to come to an end. This week Local Government minister Ignatius Chombo read the riot act. We are made to believe that all the lawlessness that has been allowed to prevail for political expedience would be coming to an end inside a week. This is bad news for those who never prepared for this… they surely cannot blame anyone for this. This is their government. And every people get a government they deserve!
O-oh finish!
Last week's watershed ruling by the Constitutional Court that police should not arrest women they suspect of loitering for purposes of prostitution was welcome by all progressive Zimbos… this was one illegality that had been allowed to flourish for too long.
Meanwhile, reports suggested that the overjoyed prostitutes… some of whom were regularly raped and or extorted from by rogue police officers, were celebrating their newly- found freedom by officering free sex to judges. Thankfully, Dr CZ is still a man of letters, not a judge, yet!
Now that another of their constituency from where rogue cops had the freedom to extort has been cut off, that leaves them primarily with those accused of this nebulous offence called "public drinking".
It is high time Dr CZ approached the same ConCourt so that it can explain what really constitutes this "public drinking" crime, and if indeed it is a crime in the first place. After hinting at this, one fan asked Dr CZ what he would offer the judges, that is tempting enough in case they need something to sway their thinking… Dr CZ is still seriously thinking about it.
If Tafadzwa Musarara & Co can have the gall to take Agriculture Minister Joseph Made to court to defend their monopoly over grain… why should Dr CZ and his soulmates not do the same? Beer firms should be too pleased to bankroll this lawsuit that Dr CZ is planning… it is their interests at stake here.
And as one fan rightly pointed out, arresting beer drinkers should be treated as an act of economic sabotage as this would reverse all the gains that have so far been realised under our highly successful Zimbabwe Agenda for Sustainable Socio-Economic Transformation blueprint. He argues: "Arresting drinkers will be tantamount to economic sabotage in the case of Zimbabwe. Breweries are some of the few companies that have survived the country's economic meltdown. But for them to have weathered the storm to this day, drinkers have supported them. So, by arresting people for so-called public drinking, the cops will in effect, be discouraging people from drinking. And when people stop or drink less, beer sales will naturally drop. The firms will have to retrench and thereby worsen unemployment. Eventually, the companies will pay less tax. It will be treasonous for the police to arrest these major economic players called drinkers for a petty crime called public drinking."
Tempting!
Dr CZ was impressed last week when Zanu-PF secretary for Administration Cde Ignatius Chombo attended the party's by-election rally in Kuwadzana towing his personal "prophet" and his personal n'anga so that the two could tell the voters the results of the June poll.
The two duly performed their task to satisfaction by telling the gathering that the former revolutionary party would be coasting to another victory… we thought this was obvious considering that the party will be contesting against itself? As much as we do not want to disparage the role of the ancestral spirits considering how important they were during the war of liberation, we however, cannot help it but shudder at the prospect of another round of the Chinhoyi diesel scenario visiting us!
On second thoughts, Dr CZ is tempted to take Cde Chombo's personal consultants seriously considering that he is reported to be one of the richest people hereabouts… maybe the formula could rub off!
Who isn't?
This week we woke up to reports that outgoing Zanu-PF youth chairman for Harare Cde Godwin Gomwe and his hangers-on were remanded in custody for allegedly extorting close to US$50 000 from Harare home seekers using the First Lady's name. The question that should be asked rather is: Who is not doing it? Isn't it the whole purpose of people getting into politics in the first place? Were it not for these benefits, Dr CZ would not be thinking of reconsidering his decision to quit the dirty game.
cznotebook@yahoo.co.uk
Source - fingaz
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